Every Student Has a Story

How well do you really know the children you teach?

Many years ago, a shy five-year-old blonde girl started first grade a bit scared and apprehensive — as most kids are on their first day of "big school." What made her transition a little easier was knowing her cousin would be in the same class. That small comfort mattered more than anyone knew, because the week before school started, her mother had died. She had a three-year-old brother at home, and even at five years old, she quietly took on the role of looking after him.

She struggled through that first-grade year. Second grade was even worse. Life was different and challenging, and she carried it mostly alone. She often wondered what her classmates thought of her — the girl without a mother — and what her teachers knew about her life at home. As far as she could tell, no adult at school acknowledged her situation or offered a word of support.

By fourth or fifth grade, something shifted. She found her footing. She stopped measuring herself against other kids' lives and began to come into her own. She made a few good friends, fell in love with geography, and became a solid student. She made it through elementary, middle, and high school carrying burdens most of her peers never had to imagine — without an advocate, without a mentor, without anyone in that building who seemed to see her whole story.

I know this because that little girl was me.

Every child sitting in your classroom has a story. Look closely and you'll find them — the child being raised by a grandparent, the one with a parent in prison, the one whose family is quietly unraveling under illness, job loss, addiction, abuse, or financial crisis. These realities don't disappear when kids walk through the school door. They follow them to their seats.

In Responsive Classroom®, one of their core principles is simply this: Know the children you teach — individually, developmentally, and culturally. That knowledge should shape our expectations, our reactions, and how we show up for students each day. Because today's teachers aren't just delivering curriculum. They're helping kids develop the social and emotional skills they'll need for life — how to cooperate, advocate for themselves, take responsibility, and show empathy for others. Being "book smart" isn't enough anymore, and teachers know it.

As the new year approaches and students return from break, take a few of those first days back to slow down. Let students reflect on the goals they set in the fall — what they've accomplished, where they've grown, what they want to work toward next. And do the same for yourself.

Ask yourself: Do I really know my students' stories? Is there a child in my class who needs an advocate — someone who sees them, checks on them, and makes them feel less alone?

Maybe that's your resolution for 2018. It might be the most important one you make.

Happy New Year!

Previously posted Dec. 30, 2017